A Grumpy Pussy, Niall’s Abducted By Aliens & Karen Loves The Harry Harry Krishnas!

It’s Episode 16 of Don’t Call Me Darling, and Niall and Karen are back with another hilarious helping of marital madness, embarrassing memories, bizarre stories and the usual nonsense that somehow passes for a podcast!

This week, it’s officially Karen’s Fault Week, although Karen doesn’t seem particularly bothered about accepting responsibility for anything! Her glasses are causing confusion, the Hare Krishnas (or should that be Harry Krishnas?) get a mention, and Niall has a rather worrying mystery on his hands. *Two whole hours of his life have completely disappeared!* Could he have been abducted by aliens during surgery, or is there a slightly more sensible explanation?

Niall also recalls the disastrous day he decided to dye his beard and woke up looking like Fu Manchu! Then it’s a trip down memory lane to Halloween in the 1960s, when costumes involved dressing up as homeless people, dunking for apples was considered entertainment, and Frankenstein was enough to scare the living daylights out of you!

There’s more childhood trauma as Niall remembers his father’s attempts to turn him into a “Hardy Man”, with questionable results!

Meanwhile, we discover L-I-A-R-S, a system used by a former Secret Service agent that supposedly helps you spot when somebody is telling porkies. Could this be dangerous information for a married couple?

Forget expensive counselling sessions! Meet Pinecone, the permanently grumpy-looking cat who might just be the therapist you never knew you needed. And from grumpy cats to holy dogs, we meet Nina, the four-legged faithful companion who refuses to miss Mass, proving that even dogs can be devoted churchgoers!

We also discover why journalling might be good for your mental wellbeing, uncover the fascinating origins of Scotland Yard and the expression “You’re Nicked!”, and take a look at James Bond creator Ian Fleming’s rather unusual daily routine.

This week’s listener dilemma is a cracker! One woman is becoming increasingly concerned about her husband’s new habit of talking to their houseplants. Is it harmless eccentricity, or has he finally lost the plot? Niall and Karen have plenty to say about that one!

And finally, there’s a new car on the market that might be absolutely perfect for geebags! Yes, you read that correctly, and no, we’re not explaining it here!

It’s another hour of laughs, nostalgia, outrageous conversations and the kind of married couple banter that proves Niall and Karen probably shouldn’t be left alone with microphones.

Don’t Call Me Darling! Because after all these years together, there’s very little darling about either of them!